Hard Talk

Everyone knows that all politicians are lying bastards, but for some reason we all like to pretend they're not. Once every few years when it's election time they all come out of the shadows and launch energetic and completely false campaigns to get re-elected, having photo's taken with babies, making outrageous promises and launching scathing personal attacks on all the other candidates. None of this comes to a surprise to anyone, and we expect it in the same way as the occasional bout of diherrea - unpleasant, occasionally unavoidable, and best forgotten.

What does surprise me is that some people fail to spot the shit and mistake it for gold. The empty promises made by these manicured heads get lodged in their brain, and they become convinced that this person, THIS PERSON will change their life! Which makes it all the more satisfying to see them crumble when the inevidible scandal is uncovered by the opposition; an illicit affair, personal indiscretion, or a rather disturbing fondness for barn animals. The soul-crushing realization that your Member of Parliament took bribes, lied, or exchanged blow-jobs for Raptors tickets, that he/she is, you know, a fucking human being and not the next coming of christ. You might even get upset enough to write a really angry letter about it.

So what's infinitely gratifying is seeing these politicians exposed outside the media friendly campaign trail, like, in newspapers, or on TV. It's called Journalism, and even though it's a dying trade you can still find enough of it if you look hard enough. We need it, if for no other reason than to piss off the smug power hoarding bastards who make up governments across the globe. They know they're corrupt lying fuck-heads, and we know that they're corrupt lying fuck-heads, but it doesn't hurt to remind everyone about it know and then.

Shouts out to my boy Jacob Zuma, currently dealing with mass rioting from the population who elected him 3 months ago based on his false promises.

Shouts out to Ayatollah Khamenei, who forgot that just because he says something it doesn't make it true, no matter how impressive his beard it.

Shouts out to the Burmese government for being offensively blatant, oppressive and scared shit-less.

And finally, shouts out to Steven Sackur. I'll never get tired of watching you make these bastards squirm.